O meu lado negro!

P: Porque é que um leproso que ia a conduzir se esbarrou?










R: Porque deixou o pé no acelerador!

Há que trabalhar...

Deve-se dar sempre 100% no trabalho:

12% à Segunda, 23% à Terça, 40% à Quarta, 20% à Quinta e 5% à Sexta!

Aqui está a fórmula para o sucesso, quando alguém conseguir que ela funcione avise... ;)

Lã...

P: Sabem de onde vem a lã virgem?








R: Das ovelhas feias....

Água...

Porque é que se diz que uma pessoa morre afogada, quando morre debaixo de água, não deveria ser aguada?

Para o Sousa

Este poema e para o meu grande amigo Sousa...

If the river was made of whiskey,
And I a diving duck,
I'd swim down to the bottom,
And drink myself back up.

Xalente segunda feira em Braga! ;)

Às Mulheres!

Aqui ficam uns pequenos versos que explicam a formação de tão bela e formosa obra de arte como é a ... Leiam!

  Seven wise men with knowledge so fine
  Created a pussy to their design.
  First was a butcher, smart with wit,
  Using a knife, he gave it a slit.
  Second was a carpenter, strong and bold,
  With a hammer and chisel, he gave it a hole.
  Third was a tailor, tall and thin,
  By using red velvet, he lined it within.
  Fourth was a hunter, short and stout,
  With a piece of fox fur, he lined it without.
  Fifth was a fisherman, nasty as hell,
  He threw in a fish and gave it a smell.
  Sixth was a preacher whose name was McGee,
  He touched it and blessed it and said it could pee.
  Last came a sailor, a dirty little runt,
  He sucked it and fucked it and called it a cunt

Poema

Isto sim é arte...

There was a young man of Loch Leven
                        
 Who went for a walk about seven.
      He fell into a pit
    That was brimful of shit,
                       
And now the poor bugger's in heaven.